Confidence and self-esteem if linked to the “outer world” will certainly get you sucked into the marketing traps of the holiday season. It’s the old “looking for love in all the wrong places” revisited – again and again.
If your sense of self-worth is tied to externals such as glitzy new toys, clothes or whatever the media says is the “new look” – you will be a sitting duck for those “Black Friday” type bait and switch deals.
I find that the clearer I get about my self as a spiritual being living and experiencing “human”, the less concerned I’m am about keeping up with the latest greatest item, or chasing after the thing that will finally “make me happy”.
Happiness is relative, and it is related to inner peace. If your happiness is in passing holiday seasons or anything else that is constantly changing in appearance, you are doomed to melancholy as the only thing that is certain is – well, change!
While I enjoy new “toys” and I like fashion, and the December holidays can be really fun, the key is to not get attached to these things. By attached I mean, enjoy them, but hold on loosely, and learn to separate your sense of identity from external advertising.
For example today I saw this message about confidence on my 16-year-old daughter’s magazine: “Total Confidence: Great ABS Butt and Legs by New Year’s” – Oh, really now? Or how about this: “All Kinds of Wonderful” with happy faces buying all of the “wonderful stuff”. Hopefully the bill will be paid by the end of the month or else those happy faces are going to go south.
In the words of Rumi:
“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
You will probably feel better and happier if you make the time to rest, and enjoy the season. Otherwise, putting too much pressure on yourself and tying your self-esteem to what you give or receive in terms of material items, or to false external promises, will create more “things to do” and there is no joy in that!
Healthy confidence will help you to “just say no” to things that use you up instead of bringing you joy. Hope you “in joy” the season!
Tags: Confidence, Happiness, Inner Peace, Self-Esteem
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Thank you so much, there aren’t enough posts on this… or at least i cant find them. I am turning into such a blog nut, I just cant get enough and this is such an important topic… i’ll be sure to write something about your site